"Bite my nipples, BITE THEM!"

I feel like there's going to be a lot of whining in this post so brace yourself for this journey into whatever.

I could go on forever about problems that might arise during sex, things that the guy isn't good at addressing, or things the girl doesn't seem to put any effort into, whatever. I need to work more on making this an objective blog, talking about things that everybody might experience and not just my own as that's creepy and super personal, but I don't know if I could really discuss some of these things without being personal?

I think being able to cum quicker/faster (or maybe just being able to make yourself to cum, but I don't think you can do that?) or just not take forever might be a big issue. I know there always seems to be the issue of guys who are premature ejaculators or just take like 5 minutes, but I can't ever say I've had this problem. I used to be under the impression that having a lot of stamina was beneficial, but I think that sort of thing is specific to the girl. I think size/girth are large (heh) factors in the matter, as the bigger you are the better you might feel (I imagine? I wouldn't know from firsthand experience), but the quicker you're going to wear her out or make her super sore, which makes it not so much fun for her.

Knowing what turns the other person on is a big deal, and that's going to be time-dependent so I'm not going to go into that. Just depends on how much effort both parties are putting in.

I guess a complaint with the women would be something I've experienced a few times over my "sex-having" years involving effort. I think I would attribute this more to distaste in your partner, bad sex or disinterest than just flat-out inexperience with having sex in general, but I've noticed some girls don't seem to do anything during sex. Some girls might not like kissing at all (which is fine, albeit a bit boring perhaps) or not be up for a certain kind of foreplay  (don't touch my nipples, no spanking, whatever), but I'm not talking about any of that. I'm describing women who you're having sex with, for one reason or another, and nothing is happening. Perhaps there will be comments like "oh, you're not even hard yet?" or something equally disparaging (I would attribute that directly to distaste or disgust with the other person, as I think it is common knowledge that "it takes two to tango", and sex is a very interpersonal act that requires input from both people), but there is no help or assistance given, no foreplay or touching, as if the very act of getting naked and lying down is all that is necessary on her part.

Now, I think if it is just unawareness or inexperience, then communication would obviously be key, as you can't possibly know what is wrong unless somebody tells you, but if you're having sex with somebody I feel the very gesture would imply that you like them enough to try and please them in that sense (though I am very young, and this whole notion of having sex as a means to an end hasn't ever really occurred in my life).

As a quick announcement, we are both still learning how to use this blog, and I've just enabled comments by anonymous users, so there is no need to register or sign up to anything in order to learn feedback; so please don't hesitate to do so if you are so inclined.

I'm a little irritated with myself, disappointed, even, at thinking that, at anytime in history before 'now' (being something like 1980 - present day), sex was not a prevalent or even common past time among people. Now, I know that sounds ridiculous, and of course without sex there would be no more human beings, as it is required in order to propagate the species. I'm not talking about that, so much as just discussions or excursions into the sexual nature of man in general. Whenever I think of the past, I think of Victorian era men and women in fancy clothes, sipping tea; or bloodthirsty soldiers charging into battle or some other cliche depiction of any historical event that comes to mind.

One thing that never occurs to me is the sexual practices of these societies, or how things of that nature were viewed by these people. I always imagine it being even more of a social faux pas than it is now, and just never being talked about by anybody; but I have to realize/understand that most of the literature and history of these eras is being written/documented/created by the upper classes, the educated, and the elite of that time period. Certainly they are not going to harbor the same views as those held by the masses (or, if they do, will certainly not admit to it openly and show that they, too, are human just like everybody else).

I recently purchased two books which definitely seem to help me correct this false notion that sex, or talking about sex and considering it a natural thing, is relatively new. Fanny Hill and My Secret Life, and though I have only just gotten started reading the latter, already I am starting to see that sexual development and curiosity has pervaded throughout mankind far more prominently than I would have previously imagined.
Perhaps I should add that I am somewhat aware that sexuality was pretty open and celebrated amongst people back in ancient times, I suppose I'm referring specifically to the past 1000 years or so.

It's fascinating to learn about these practices and how they were viewed throughout history; to know how people thought about sex during these times or how important it might have been throughout individuals' lives, what they knew about STDs and other sorts of dangers related to sexual promiscuity and all of that. It's also a bit of a shock to see the word 'fuck' printed in a book published in the 1800s, as I normally have a hard time imagining anybody using profanity back then (though I know this is another fault of mine).

Sex with every girl is different, and some girls are definitely far more experienced (or just simply 'better') at it than others, but I don't really know if there is any kind of 'rating system' I would use, necessarily. Sometimes sex with somebody is really good, sometimes not so much, but generally it stays within the same 'level' (as no other term comes ot mind at this moment) overall. Sex with Mall Girl might not always be a 10/10, but it would never be worse than an 8/10, for instance.

There isn't anybody that comes to mind who I can routinely remember having boring, lame sex with. There have been girls who were boring, but we never did anything past the first time; and there have been girls who, for one reason or another, the sex just never worked out or was really bad (though I accept full responsibility where it is due); but for the most part I feel that a majority of the sex that I've had has been, for better or worse, pretty spectacular.

I feel rhythm is important, as well as touching, kissing, licking, fondling all over the body as often as possible. I am aware that some women can't get off on simply penetration, and need much more stimulation to get that pleasurable sensation. Friction (or lack thereof) is another incredibly important factor, along with position and all of that jazz. I know it's always awkward talking about sex, especially the mechanics thereof, but I think if one is able to bridge that gap and just say what they're thinking, it will go a long way in improving the lives of both participants. 

I am a little tactless when it comes to my interactions with the ladies at times, as I had an incident with RA recently whereas I thought she was asking me for any critiques or advice on sex, and I mentioned brushing her teeth and cleaning up 'down there' (as I generally love going down on women, but not so much if they're gross), which was a huge blow to her self-esteem (and making me look like a complete asshole). However, it seemed to work out alright as the next time that we did have sex (which was beyond amazing, I must add), kissing her alone was 10x better.

Man, I'm supposed to be reading Paradise Lost right now. Not looking forward to that AT ALL

So I'm sitting here, getting crazy stoned with a friend (can I say that? Is that ok?) and it hits me. I have this beautiful woman asking me to write a book with her and I have absolutely no ideas as to what to write about, but then I'm like "oh, duh, I'll write about sex!"
 Now, I know how that sounds. Like, "oh, hey, he wants to 'write a novel with her', how quaint, how unique and underground." But it's seriously not like that.
I have books that STARTED out as a blog. Stuff White People Like? Totally a fucking blog, I felt so ashamed of myself when I found that out, "like I paid money for this when I could have read it for free?" But thinking about it, I'm glad I have it. Giving somebody a book like that to borrow is so much better than "oh hey, check out this link to a blog I found and have kinda looked through it a bit," which is blowing my mind how obvious this is but whatever.

Either way, I feel like almost everything in my life has been leading up to something like this; that whole "oh, I think I'm having an epiphany" or whatever, (lol) but I think this would seriously be fucking awesome, because I'm of the persuasion that this would improve every aspect of my life (if it turns out to be successful, which it will, because everybody loves sex). I want to talk about sex, because I am so interested in learning in all walks of life, and learning about sex would be such a benefit not only to myself, but to everybody else, too. I want to feel less awkward with women, I want to talk about things that I SHOULDN'T be afraid to talk about, because I'm totally against all of that 'taboo' shit; and I think all of this stuff is SO important for people to know about, and would improve their lives SO MUCH.

That being said, it's just a blog, and so it wouldn't even be a big deal. Maybe in the future it will be a book (and that would be fucking cool as hell; but it's the journey, not the destination), but until then I would just love the chance to not only get an opportunity to write, but to write about something I really enjoy with somebody who has like so much more experience with it, and of the opposite sex!? fucking kickass, we could learn SO much. I already have discussions about this sometimes with an ex, who is really open with all of this stuff (which I really love), and I learn so much about how to be better in bed and how to know my body better.
 If people don't talk about things, how will they know? And I think this would help make me into a fucking champion (literally and figuratively), because I want to know all the ins and outs (pun intended) of how to please a woman, and if I can learn something about things that will have an active impact in my life (as well as the genitals of a number of women), then I don't know why I wouldn't try to enrich not only my life, but the lives of others (via sharing this information on some dinky little blog).

I have always tried my hardest (heh) to make the women I was with cum as many times as possible before they need a break. JD normally tires out after three, RA I think I've gotten to 6 or 7, and I'm lucky if I can get my ex to cum more than twice in one session, and I know there have been women in the past (such as MB, who I could bring to 5 almost regularly, I think our record was 8) who I have thoroughly enjoyed (jk, I have thoroughly enjoyed all of the women I've been with, and I'd like to think they could say the same).

Anyway, the whole thing that sparked all this was that me and RA are fooling around, and we get to talking and I find out that all of the things I thought she was into, she wasn't. I know sex is so much more than just the penetration that people would attribute with it, and that pleasing a woman is so much more than just getting hard and fucking the shit out of her.
That being said, I know I still could learn so much more about how to make a lady just lose it in the bedroom, and have every intention of doing so. I want to do so much in this world while I am here, and making sure I know how to have good sex is definitely something I would consider incredibly important.

I feel like empathy is one of the most important things a person can foster within themselves in the quest to become a better person. Everything else has its place, but in a world where interacting with others, making friends and having a safety net to support you when in need it can be crucial at the right time, being able to not only see things from another perspective but to understand that every experience that has happened to you up until this point in your life is yours and yours alone. Nobody has accrued the same life lessons, experiences and information as anybody else; and even if they have, it has come to them through a different lens of perception, so that they might not even draw the same lessons, insights or morals from such an event as you yourself might. to berate, insult, or demean one because they lack the knowledge and understanding  that you have is to impede their progress in learning those same lessons. This is such a short-sighted, competitive view of things that puts you in a 'win-lose' mindset, where in reality, it is a 'win-win' situation if anything at all. There is no competition, however, and you're not working against each other. If people would work together, everybody would benefit.

Living in a house with three other people, two of which are younger than myself, can be really frustrating, but it's an interesting experience to see people who are in roughly the same spot, but haven't quite learned or experienced all the things that I have. Some asshole might use this as a reason to think that they're better than these individuals, but that's arrogance and pretentiousness and probably stems from that person's need to feel important or superior. To not work with somebody in discovering more about themselves is to work against them, and I don't understand why there seems to be so much hate in one another as to actively work towards halting another's progress through life when you have nothing to gain from doing so.

There was a Dan Carlin podcast that I had listened to a little while ago, from his show Hardcore History, which was toying with the idea that if Hard Times make Hard People, do Soft Times make Soft People? Do generations who've lived through things like the Great Depression or the Red Scare after WWII have a better threshold for bullshit than those who've grown up in easier, more prosperous times? Perhaps I haven't had it as good as I could've, but I most certainly haven't had it as bad as I might have, either. It seems to me that people who don't know what a 'tough life' is, who haven't had to endure serious struggles throughout their lives (be them financial, emotional or otherwise) are people who overreact on an almost consistent basis, who freak out over things that are hardly worth getting bent out of shape over, and who worry or stress out about things they cannot change or influence. To simply understand that life goes on appears to me the most beneficial outlook in any situation, because things can ALWAYS be worse, and to not be thankful that you're still living, breathing and thinking is to overlook all of the gains and positive factors that are present in your life. This passage sounds a bit like some preachery sermon or some bullshit, but I'm not religious at all, and don't feel you need to be to understand that a positive outlook on life is the best outlook to have.

I'm still far from grown up, and the whole idea of maturity has always been really confusing for me. I've always been told I'm very mature for my age, but maturity seems like such an obscure, hard thing to define or to understand. Does maturity mean having self-discipline and self-control? Because I have neither of those. Does it mean being wise and not doing stupid things spontaneously because YOLO... I do all of that too. I think being smart is helpful and super important, but I also want to have fun, enjoy my life, and do my best to live 'in the moment'. I like to think of maturity best as a Venn diagram, perhaps, where, in one bubble you have 'expectations' and the other is 'reality'. The conjoining of these two spheres would happen as one became more mature, experiencing all that life has to offer and having a better idea of what to expect from any given situation (though perhaps this has its faults, suggesting that maturity comes with a jaded, pessimistic view of life and what it has to offer). If you've ever seen the movie 500 Days of Summer, the scene where Summer invites him to her little rooftop party thing and the screen splits into two scenes where one shows what he 'wants' to happen as he gets there and the other one shows what actually happens is probably the best example of this that I've ever seen. Either way, I think being mature just means having a better idea of how people work, how things work, and how life actually is as opposed to how you want it to be.

Intelligence and wit are important, as are all other things, but they're never as important as I had once imagined. I grew up thinking that being smart was the single most important thing one could strive to attain. Nobody is 'born' smart, but some people are born with a greater drive to 'become' smart; to research things, to read books, to question others and search for an answer for themselves. I never seem to learn as much as I hope to, but I never feel like I'm 'not' learning things, and it deeply saddens me when people shrug off school and institutions of learning because their school experience was less than pleasant and thus they link the concept of 'learning' with this boring classroom filled with boring people, which only further shuns them away from any kind of academic pathway. This is, to an extent, true, I will admit, but it is primarily up to you to decide what you get out of the courses and paths that you take when in any academic institute. Besides that, learning isn't something you're only doing in the classroom, but everywhere, at all times throughout your life you are gaining experience and wisdom. There's a Cherokee saying that I am particularly drawn towards which reads "everything in life comes to you as a teacher. Pay attention. Learn quickly," which I think everybody should be aware of. Every day of your life, every thing you do, ever person you talk to, every mistake you make or task you embark on, is a learning experience that can either be seen as a 'waste of time,' "when am I ever going to do this shit again?" or a chance to learn something about how people think, how to interact with others, how the world works, and how life seems to be. I would like to think of learning as something interesting and fun, but maybe I'm just that fucked up.

This might be a little scatterbrained, but then again, I have no idea what I'm doing. This blog is purely to sharpen our abilities in writing and effectively turn us into persons of letters, so although I may not have a solid notion of where I'm going or what I'm doing now, the fact that I'm doing anything at all should be a sure sign of growth and learning. To make no mistakes is to make no progress, also.

Everything I do in my life is my responsibility. I am making all sorts of mistakes but I am learning from them and getting all of those badass 'real life experiences' that you always hear errbody talkin' about. Who can say they had sex with some hot-ass milf all over the town where they grew up, or been in crazy intense car accidents and got severely fucked up, but lives to talk about it and is just fine? I see all these people who are so worn out or depressed about their life for one reason or another, and it's stupid. We have it so much better than so many other people around the world, in this day and age as well as any time in the thousands of years before us. To squander any opportunities we are presented in lieu of complaining about shit you can't change is retarded and you might as well be dead.

All I want to do is improve myself, learn from everything and everybody and make the most of my time doing what I enjoy. Right now I'm trying to start this writing blog thing with a friend and, as you can tell, I don't really have any idea of what I'm supposed to be doing. What do I write about? Shit that I've learned or researched in my classes, yeah ok. I'm not too concerned about that right now, as I'm following that whole "a thousand-mile journey begins with the first step" and figure that, as long as we keep walking, we'll get there.

I read all kinds of blogposts and funny little blurbs, I'm really kind of offended by how boring and dull this is.

A writer's blog is born!

So I'm creating this blog in response to a rather exciting proposition made to me by a good friend of mine who has expressed interest in writing a book. I'd love to, and if we work on this I don't see why it couldn't happen; simply having the desire to do so puts us in the right direction. Baby steps!

I'm not sure what type of book this will be, but I don't think that's anything to fret over just yet. I'd like to say I read often, but maybe not as often as I like. As of now I think this blog will be more akin to a nice little forum for the two of us to brainstorm our ideas, talk about our experiences and thoughts that would look good on paper, and what things interest us and might fill a good portion of our book.